Saturday, May 21, 2011


so i am sitting here thinking of all the great things in my life. its easy to sit and dwell on the bad and try to come up with answers that you will never get. like why did i have to go down the path i did to find happiness?, why did i have to lose the baby? why is it so hard to keep a good relationship with an ex husband and the father of my child?, why cant something just go smoothly? I will never get the answer to these questions. but i can look at all the great things that have come out of the choices i have made and the things both good and bad that i have experienced. like my divorce. if i have never left Carlos i would have never moved to Arizona and i would have never met the amazing people i have. like my amazing husband Anthony,
he has shown me what a good relationship is. and has shown me that i deserve to be treated well and to have someone in my life that wants to help me and be my partner. he has taken on so much. to take on not only me and all the issues that i have he takes on my wonderful son. Anthony is a great stepfather and an amazing husband a girl couldn't ask for more.

i have also met great new friends while since i moved here, not only for me but for my son as well.

Matt Rosenkilde, this man is a great friend. its a new experience having a male best friend but we have the kind of bond that wont break. he has been there for me since we met. we have helped each other through the good times and the bad. i have been there to pick him up off the ground and he does the same for me. he has taught me that things aren't always the way they seem. and that friendship can happen so fast that you cant even see how you have gotten this far in life without that friend.
Alex. this friendship is more like having a sister that is your best friend. recently with the lose of the baby she has been there to help me work through it. to keep my mind off of it when that is best and make me talk about it when that is what i need to do. she is the type of friend every girl needs. her little girl joey is one of Christians friends. they are stuck at the hip and love to spend time together. i don't know if i could get through some rough patches with out her friendship.
Tammy Elyse and Lisa (not pictured) TTW girls. this is a friendship i didn't think would happen we bonded over the oddest experience but i am lucky to have these fun loving girls in my life. our nights of coloring and talking are the best.

Lisa Winterton (LeFever), Kassie Health (Goodwin), Audri Wadsworth (Wilson), and Kristina Everson (Lindhardt) whom is not pictured because if i put up the picture i have of her she would kill me. are the types of friendships that last. we have had fights and fall outs. but i know i can count of these girls for anything.

   i have been lucky, even though i have made some wrong choices, made some wrong turns i have come out on top i have a great husband a wonderful son and the best of friends both old and new i have come to realize that not all friendships are built to last but the ones that are... well they are amazing some of the friends i made when i was as young as 2 years of age are some of the best relationships and the best friends that i will ever have


  1. Ah my sweet Kitty the Camel Colton-Vanorden ;)
    I love you! Know that even though we are far apart we are instant friends whenever you need me. Life is hard, but it just makes us better and better. I'm just a phone call away.

  2. awww.. thanks girl. Just know that I feel the same way about you. (and thanks for not putting up embarassing photos of me :) ). I'm so sorry to hear you lost the baby! I don't know what you're going through, but I hope you know that I'm here if you need me. I can't wait to see you.
    Love you!!!!!!!!